Why bastards are more successful in life than good guys!

One of the books that made me laugh like a hysterical hyena has been written by an author that can only be described as a true bastard.

The book: I hope they serve beer in hell. The author: Tucker Max.

Luckily he has self-knowledge because he starts his rampage on the slutiness and stupidity of the female gender, his own idiotic behavior and the successful life that is the direct consequence of it, with literally stating that he is an asshole. He drinks excessively, fucks around like a rabbit and leads a rock ‘n roll life only a few people on this planet lead and it all works out perfectly for him. So why on earth should he change? Who can blame him? It happens too often that the chick utters ‘let’s just stay friends because I don’t want to lose the special relationship we have (barf)’ to the nice guy and totally devours the person that just spend 3 hours making a fool out of her in a way you only see in hardcore porn movies. But is there any scientific support for the urban myth that bad guys get the girl and good guys can give it another go with their dominant hand?

To answer this question we need to define what an asshole is, cause for some strange reason the word is not often used in scientific literature. Assholes tend to think that they are directly related to god and thus show enlarged self-esteem. High self-esteem has been linked to success, but is not necessary the cause of it. It just goes hand in hand, just as STD’s go with ‘banga lists’.

Doesn’t thinking that you are untouchable and can get away with anything imply more than high self-confidence? Isn’t it narcissism that the bad boys show? The feeling of overall grandiosity, low levels of empathy, being an attention-whore as well as notorious gamblers in relationships? Narcissism has been widely studied and is considered to be a personality disorder. Say what? Yes, society classifies those who think they are awesome and don’t give a shit about anything else than their own ego and the noble mission to reproduce themselves with as many partners as possible, as mentally ill.

Weird, cause a lot of people that can be described as the most powerful in the world show traits that are linked to narcissism and high self-esteem. Would you want to vote for people who are being stamped as mentally disturbed? Though luck, cause narcissists appear to thrive on chaos and short-term profit.They are charismatic and don’t back down for risks. Doesn’t this sound like every dictator and populist leader in the world?

It is exactly these characteristics that make assholes appear as successful as they are. Getting a lot of women in a short period, making rapid success in the business world etc. It has been proven that they are not very good at positive outcomes in the long run, but I doubt that this is something most of them give a shit about. Their risk taking fosters experimentation and thus a more wild lifestyle, something that most people (at least the more younger ones) admire. Who of you rather wanted to be Ross the ‘I married a lesbian and can’t get my relationship with a beautiful woman to work’ paleontologist instead of Joey the ‘I am too stupid to tie my shoelaces but I can nail anyone I like’ womanizer?

So this is hardly rocket science, we all know that bad boys are not exactly a safe bet if you want a stable future. So why do females people get suckered into their charming web of indulgence? Well narcissism has somehow been related to short term attractiveness. One night stands or other quests to collect all venereal disease out there, are highly reliant on attractiveness. Assholes are pretty good at coming across like a healthy mate that will ensure a good night. And even if their face looks far from the one Justin Timberlake is wearing, they will play with your feelings until you will slide of your bar stool.

So good guys, the good news is that your chances of a healthy relationship are higher than that good looking prick or skank that is hitting on your partner every night. Little problem, they have the advantage of being able to make themselves come across like a very tasty snack. Before they know it their evolutionary libido got the best of them and all that is left is that sucky ‘Oh my god, we didn’t mean to end up like this’ feeling. Think about that the next time people tell you, showing your jealousy is a nasty habit. Or just act like this guy if you find out.